I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize
