He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Randomize
