Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Randomize
