I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize