Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
