So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
