Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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