these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Randomize
