Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize