That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Acid is not a monday night drug
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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