theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
