His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
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