Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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