brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
i think i have herpe
just one?
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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