Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
