This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
