I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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