i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
