hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
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