just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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