We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
is that a dick in a sweater?
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
