so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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