It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
