I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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