no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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