So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Swine flu. Run for my life!
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize