Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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