Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Randomize