this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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