The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Randomize
