So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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