names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Randomize
