I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
