I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
