I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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