Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
