I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Randomize
