it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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