I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Randomize
