this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
