How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
It's official drugs can't kill me
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
