you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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