ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Randomize
