He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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