Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
