Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
