thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
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