She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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