its not stalking. its research.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
