Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
