How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
